Saturday, July 28, 2012

New Business Strategy: Do Business with Samsung, get bought by Apple

You've probably may not have heard that Apple is buying a mobile security firm called AuthenTec for $356 million. Other than creating a few more bearded millionaires, this is probably not would have been a big deal. Apple buys companies all the time, right?
How about a company that just signed a big deal with it's rival Samsung. Now Samsung is wondering whether AuthenTec will do business with them anymore. This is great for AuthenTec. They make the thing that on laptops that you were supposed swipe your finger across to unlock the laptop. They also do that for phones in Japan. So in Japan, you pay by caressing your phone. Maybe Samsung thought that it was a good idea and wanted to make phones that do the same thing. Apple then thought that if anybody is going to swipe their screens, it can only be people who own iPhones. So they essentially bought AuthenTec to keep away the finger swiping technology away from Samsung.
It's also good news for a lot of other companies. So the message is that if you have a cool technology, invest all your efforts in trying to get an exclusive deal with Samsung. The moment you do, expect a call from Cupertino with an offer you can't refuse.
Is this the future of business? It sounds that that 80s joke that ended like "...and in response to Europe acquires Africa while Japan buys South America".

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

The bullets are in the mail

First of all, my condolences to the family and victims of the Batman movie shooting in Colorado. I deeply sympathize with what they are going through.
But I have to say something about the killer. No, not alleged. We are definitely passed that. We passed that the moment the police had to send in the bomb squad to remove the booby traps in his apartment. What I can't get out of my head is that he got loads of ammunition over the Internet and had them mailed to him.
What a crazy world we live in when we can get bullets delivered to us. It used to be a thing that you could threaten someone by sending them a bullet in an envelope. This guy asked for them in the dozens.
And in the mail, for pete's sake. You can't even send liquids in the mail for fear they might leak. You can't even dab a bit of talcum powder to make that romantic birthday card smell sweeter without Homeland Security kicking down the door. And this guy got bullets send to him. Which is more dangerous or suspect? The so-called solutions looking for a problem?

Friday, July 20, 2012

Sing to your picture frame

Why go out and embarrass yourself in karaoke bars when you can do that in the comfort of your home. A company called Yeylol is selling digital picture frames that can double up as a karaoke player. I'm not sure which is more embarrassing, you singing karaoke at a bar or having people catching a glimpse of you singing to a picture frame. Makes a great basis for the insanity plea at your murder trial.
Lawyer: "And what did you see your neighbor Mr. Rogers do every night through his bedroom window?"
Witness: "He was singing to the picture frame."
Lawyer: "Who in their right mind sings to their picture frame every night?"

It's really a PC that has all sorts of functions. One of them is apparently that you can hook it up to closed circuit cameras. I have question: Why? Do you want to narrate their break-in? Provide a play-by-play. "They have gotten past the iron gate and are attempting pick the front door lock with what looks like a standard pick. Will the BruteBolt 5000's tumber's be able to withstand the onslaught? Or will it prove to be a 500 dollar investment up in smoke?"
Or provide a sound track to the robber's adventure with your human beat box?
So you can serenade your intruders away? Wait. That maybe not too bad. They might be frightened enough by the wailing to give up and go. 

Monday, July 16, 2012

Wearing Google Glasses in Paris can cause physical harm

I hate to say it but I told you so. Didn't I tell you some time ago that wearing Google glasses is going to bring physical harm. I said that people were going get physical with you if you wear Google glasses. Now someone has. And it's not even Google glasses. It's a digital eye glasses made by arguably the father of wearable computing. It's practically the same thing, made and worn by the father of wearable computing for goodness sake. Could there be a better test case?
The story is that he was accosted in a Parisian McDonalds... wait a minute... accosted by the French? Isn't that some sort of euphemism? With seedy undertones..
Well, there he was, eating with his family, wearing his digital eye glasses when some employees came up to him and his family. Words were exchanged, in French presumably. And they were booted out of the restaurant, apparently, rudely. So let me get this straight: The French selling American fast food kicked out a Canadian who had brought his family to Paris so that their kids can practice their French in France. Were the French that offended? Did they miss Minitel that much?
This can only mean one thing. This clearly proves that eating American fast food with all it's salt and questionable meats will only make the rude even rude-er.

For a more serious discussion on Google glasses and privacy click here.

Thursday, July 5, 2012

Where all those stories about dragons came from.

The discovery site has a really nice picture of a lizard that bears a striking resemblance to the dragon.

I think this is the real dragon. Can you imagine the guy woke up to find this lizard on his face and screamed like a girl at the top of his lungs? Guess what he told his friends who came to his help? I bet you can.
There you go, the source of all those dragon stories.

I first found this on Amanda Blain's Google+ post.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

FedEx wants use flying drones. What could go wrong?

Have your heard that FedEx want to use flying drones in the US? Apparently they want to use it to send packages. What next? UPS to use drones to do door to door delivery ? What are they going to do? Drop packages from the sky to each house? Should we have to be worried being bonked by dropping packages soon?
You know, they are going to have driver-less cars soon. But it'll probably start with trucks. So you can imagine a driver-less UPS truck pull up, opens it's hatch and out comes this hovering flying drone with your package. No harm there. There hasn't been any warning whatsoever about robots taking over the world. It's a novel idea. Nobody has thought about it. So it's probably safe.
You know what will happen? The drones will just hover over the to neighbor's house and ask them to sign for your package.  I'm sure they will be willing to do anything to get a flying drone with 4 spinning rotor blades off their doorstep.
Update: Apparently, Amazon is thinking the same.